I don't make it to Bellevue very often - by choice. Yes, that's all about to change, for the mean time, I tend to stay away. For some reason, I decided to have my direct report Christmas Dinner at the new 0/8 Seafood and Twisted Cork place. The wretched dinner wasn't what got my attention - it was the weather. We decided to check out the new fangled Bellevue street life that the city is trying to force to happen.
Bellevue trying to make "bustley streets" happen is like your dad growing his hair like Ty Pennington and going shirtless and trying to make that happen. So these drummer boys come out and start banging on drums and march down Bellevue Way and then its started "snowing."
Big fat flakes of synthetic soap product came tumbling down in surprising volume. People's faces lit up, cars honked their horns and yuletide cheer rolled down the streets. For a second, I didn't recognize the joint. We made our way into the pool hall for drinks and stick and as I kept looking outside, watching the fake snow come down in fake drifts, I have to admit, it had an effect. My retail glands were getting gently squeezed. I wanted to shop, have another drink, stay a little longer to wait out the weather.
All of this is totally perverse and what's even more perverse is how effective it is. Why can't cities across America organize massive fake snow drifts on Christmas? It's so much neater and cleaner and the schools can stay open too.
Merry Christmas Bellevue. And a very special Merry Christmas to you, Kemper Freeman...Kindly go fuck yourself.