Lindsay Lohan made a $25,000 bet with her friends that she can bang David Beckham. This friendly little pool-side wager got me thinking that somewhere on this earth, freckled sleezy, hoochie momma's (whose only claim to fame are rehab stints and the occasional Tina Fey movie) are making big goddamn bets about banging quasi-retired, foreign, sculpted orange soccer players....
Oops, hold on a sec...I gotta take this....
"I'm sorry, sweetie, pick up what at the store? Canned Tuna? White Tuna? OK. Bye. "
Now, what was I talking about again?....
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