I have a thing with music. Well, most people do but I think mine is unique. There is some music that bores me. Ok, there is some music that bores everyone. And I'm not talking bored like listening to the Carpenters, or Henri Mancini's "Lujon," I'm talking bored as in if I ever hear this song again I'm going to take a flame thrower to whatever this place is that I'm in and take at least 50 people with me in a fiery ball or torment and rage.
Why, you might ask do I have such a strong reaction to some music and what is that music. Excellent two part question.
In College I played in a cover band. Sounds funny but it made sense at the time. Play frat parties, chicks, roadies, beer, money, and not bad money either. It beat doing other college jobs like valet parking, lumber mills or working Pizza or selling adds in fledgling hip-hop magazines - all of which i did. But nothing beat playing gigs. I mean, i got to play rock and roll that other people wrote - for money. Sometimes, even women.
One poignant side effect of this fun hobby/part time job was you had a collection of "old standby songs" that everyone asked for (at the time). And, the band was filled with dorks from the south end, which meant they were holding desperately to their cultural glory years of 1983-4 and all the shite, white boy music that came with it. My pleas for Public Enemy, Violent Femmes, Smiths, Jesus Jones, Run DMC, Living Color, were met with Johnny Cougar, Billy Idol, Bryan Adams, INXS. And the hicks we played to liked those bands so we developed The Standby list. We all know these songs. They're played at weddings, sporting events, but to me, they are a special kind of poison.
Imagine a song you really hate. Imagine practicing it over and over to get it perfect. Now Imagine having to perform it in public. Then imagine having to "sell it" such that people want to dance to it. Then imagine people digging on you selling this piece of shit music holding the bile in your stomach just below your esophagus. Then imagine doing this EVERY WEEKEND for four years.
When I hear these songs, I go mental. I know them inside and out. Hell, I can play them backwards and forwards. But they make my skin and eyes and ears burn. Some people hear these songs and want to dance. I want to (quoting Johnny Rotten) GET-PISSED-DES-TROOOOOYYYYYYY....
Mony Mony
What I like About You
Rebel Yell
Dancing With Myself
Twist and Shout
Careless Whisper
Walk This Way
Don't Dream Its Over
Something About You
Don't Be Cruel
La Bamba
Summer of 69
R-O-C-K in the USA
New Sensation
Devil Inside
Need You Tonight
She Drives Me Crazy
Feel free to add others...
Recent Comments